I was surfing the net, looking for an answer on whether love = commitment. Last week, sinabi ko na hindi pamantayan ang commitment readiness ng isang tao para mo siya mahalin o para pagdudahan ang pagmamahal niya sa iyo. Today I'm thinking if I was right.

As expected, walang matinong result. Puro blogs ng mga taong nasawi sa pag-ibig. Pinaka-credible kong nakita iyong article ni Paul Dobransky. He's an American psychiatrist, author of three books, and a lecturer on dating, relationships and pop psychology. Sabi pa ni Wiki, he also has appeared na on TV programs such as The Bachelor. Worth reading naman yung sinulat niya. Here oh: http://us.penguingroup.com/static/html/blogs/6-20-07-passion-love-and-commitment-are-not-same-thing

Plus, I've also learned that there's a triangular theory of love. It ivolves intimacy (which encompasses feelings of closeness, connectedness, and bondedness), passion (which encompasses drives that lead to romance, physical attraction, and sexual consummation) and commitment (which encompasses, in the short term, the decision to remain with another, and in the long term, the shared achievements and plans made with that other). Ito pa nga yung table oh:

	Intimacy	Passion	Commitment
Nonlove
Liking/friendship	x
Infatuated love		x
Empty love			x
Romantic love	x	x
Companionate love	x		x
Fatuous love		x	x
Consummate love	x	x	x

Ang daming requirements noh?! Mahirap talagang magmahal.

                                                            To the place that is not my home
                                                                    But to where I am now
                                                                    Lost, but still reaching
                                                                  The dreams I had desired
                                                            Hoping, that they will still be mine

I attended a press conference today on Breast Cancer Awareness hosted by the Tawam Hospital and John Hopkins Medicine International. As I was leaving the room (because the press conference was postponed as respect to the member of the UAE royal family who just died), the CEO of the hospital arrived and greeted me.

I have interviewed him last month for last week's issue of the Al Ain Times News. I reported about the so-called Emiratisation in Al Ain, which applies even to the country's health sector.

Since he hasn't received yet the copy of our paper Al Ain Times News already sent to him, and there was one lying around in the table closest to us, I've thought of showing it to him and joke on his picture (when I took his photo, he said he would allow me only if I promise to make him look thin).

I was proud of our 50th issue -- it was my 'best' issue so far as far as the contents and my writings are concerned, so I was not expecting that he would be angered with my report. "Do you want me killed, Lucky?" "But Sir, I just wrote what we had talked about." "Do you have to write the truth?" butted Brian Francesca, the hospital's CFO. "Well, of course..."

I haven't told this yet to my 'editor.' I'm troubled whether I should apologize or not. I do not think I have done anything wrong, but a source's a source. Haay.

This is my first published article in a national daily. I wrote it when I was 18, with the passion of then 23-year old subeditor (Terrie Fucanan). I can still remember complaining to her for editing my 'style.' But rereading it now, I find it funny how it got into the Manila Times. Kaya siguro this was the last (I'm not sure if it was the first) edition of Youth Speak in the paper.

* * * *

It has been five years. Many things have changed. I do not believe that love should be a leprechaun's anymore. But there are times when I wish that I hadn't known what love is. It's hard to rebuild friendships. It's hard to rebuild trust. It's hard when you are hurt and betrayed. It's hard when you are hurting someone too, wittingly or not. It's hard when you have to compromise what you were used to for your relationship's sake. And in the end, you could lose the person you most wanted to be with.

But of course, I knew, those come along with the price.

1. Learn photography.
2. Learn Arabic, Chinese, Spanish and French.
3. Learn how to converse with mute people.
4. Do something for Philippine Tourism. How about a book of all the country’s fiestas? Or a guide on how to go to places here? Feeling ko kasi kulang ang tourism awareness and campaigns dito kaya kahit Pinoy, hindi pinapahalagahan ang yamang kanya.
5. Put up a foundation. Aimed for the protection and preservation of our environment.
6. Contribute to the comics industry of the Philippines.
7. Write a book. Is there such a thing as semi-non fiction?
8. Film a documentary on OFWs.
9. Learn Photoshop.
10. Understand financial markets.
11. Know the countries in the world, and their capitals :)
12. Be grammar-free.
13. Learn karate or any self-defense martial art.
14. Hike Mt. Apo.
15. Bake cakes.
16. Sing in a bar.
17. Write a play and/or be in one.
18. Learn how to shoot a gun. (Ano bang tawag sa sport na yun?)
19. Learn how to apply make-up.
20. Get featured in a magazine or in a billboard : )
21. Lobby for ‘Psychiatry Act.’ Wala pa akong mas catchy name for it. Gusto ko lang paigtingin yung mental healthcare sa Pinas. Sakop yung mga prisoners and those who have undergone tragedies in life. Masyado kasing negative yung term na psychiatry sa atin eh. Kaya maraming petty crimes and people who give up in life easily.
22. See wrecks.
23. ***** *** (Hulaan mo Jad, for P1 million, ehehehe!)

I still want to compose songs, kaso nakakatamad na lately eh. Maybe because I know that before I can let everybody hear it, I have to find one pa who could translate it into music. Plano ko pa rin matuto ng sand art or sculptures, kaso hindi nga ako marunong mag-drawing eh… I also want to be a subject for body painting or nude painting. Try ko rin ang air dancing!

Another thing: Be the EIC for Marid. Jad and Jes may not agree, but I really want to do something for the agro-industry of our country. Haay, I really hope I can achieve these things. Motto nga ni Punch: Believe in yourself! Ehehehehehe! So pray for me guys!

It's already past 3 am in the Philippines and I am already two days older. But I want to treasure more this day. Ask Jad. He knows why.

Anyway, back in college, I remember Dr. Lazaro telling us about the four things that comprise a person. Actually, he modelled to us a square divided into four parts, and each one of it says something on who a person is. Square One, what you know about yourself that others know too. Square Two, what you know about yourself that others do not know. Square Three, what others know or can tell about you that you do not know. And Square Four, what no one - even yourself - do not know about you. I'm particularly interested with Square Three, what you people can say about me.

Sige na. Birthday ko pa rin naman dito eh. Violent comments are allowed. Nandiyan naman si Jad sa Pinas eh. Wala pang pasalubong, ehehehehehe!

1. Antartica. Just for one day. Just to see if I can survive there.
2. Rome. Jorge had been there : ) But really, I’ve been wanting to visit the ‘city in a city’ named Vatican. I also want to go to the churches and piazzas mentioned in the Da Vinci Code and Angel and Demons. Sobrang nalito kaya ako nun.
3. Cuba. Now that its president has stepped down – leaving behind controversies – I want to see how is the place that still boasts the 1950 culture.
4. Maldives.
5. The World. A real estate project of the UAE. The world lay out in the country’s coast. (Ireland was already bought. Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt bought some islands too but I’m not sure what it is. I want to buy the Philippines. Prices range from $6-$36 million. Whew!)
6. Saadiyat Island. A cultural district in Abu Dhabi. Scheduled to be completed in 2018.
7. Montreux, Switzerland. Jazz Festival. Ride the Train des Vignes.
8. Malabar, Kerala, India.
9. Australia.
10. Sotheby, New York. Ehehehe, I wouldn’t buy anything. Just to see priceless treasures.
11. France. Our housemate, Ate Digna, said the food served there is simply sumptuous.
12. Cape Town, South Africa
13. Finland!
14. Masai Mara, Kenya.
15. Verona, Italy. Romeo and Juliet’s hometown (wink!)
16. China. Sigh.
17. Japan. Sigh. Sigh.
18. Luxor, Egypt.
19. Cambodia. Angkor Wat. Ta Prohm. 
20. Machu Picchu, Peru
21. Statues of Easter Island, Chile
22. Stonehenge, United Kingdom
23. Neuschwanstein Castle, Schwangau, Germany

Yes, the last five were either finalists or are acclaimed New Seven Wonders of the World, and I’ve voted for them!

1. Batanes. Stone houses. South China Sea.
2. Abra. Wonder why so many political killings are happening there.
3. Benguet. Very rich history. I want to have a piece of it. Plus, Sagada Falls.
4. Ifugao. Igorots and Banaue Rice Terraces.
5. Laoag, Ilocos Norte. Spanish houses. Kaibigan Falls.
6. Pangasinan. Meet Pangasinenses.
7. Corregidor, Bataan. I reported about it when I was in Grade II.
8. Taal Volcano, Batangas. Last time I checked (and that’s years ago :), it’s the only volcano surrounded by waters.
9. Payatas, Quezon. Ever since I heard how they celebrate their fiesta, I’ve been interested to go there.
10. Angustia, Nabua, Camarines. My hometown.
11. Donsol, Sorsogon. Swim with sharks, locally known as ‘butanding.’
12. Palawan. They say it’s cleaner than Baguio.
13. Marinduque. John Hendrix, disc jockey from GMA FM radio, is from there.
14. Romblon. Banton. Also, my first crush is from Romblon.
15. Camiguin. Loriculus camiguinensis.
16. Camp Sabros, Davao del Sur. Experience the ‘Flight for Life.’ Nasa Davao City naman yung katukayo ko.
17. Zamboanga Sibugay. I want to see why it has become a city. It has not been for the past 20 years of my life.
18. Iloilo. Some of the people I met here are from the Visayas. Most of them are from Iloilo. And they’re fun to be with. Parang walang problema. Or parang lahat ng problema nila, madali lang. I want to see why.
19. Dinagat Islands. The latest province I’ve come to know.
20. Bukidnon. Pineapples. Bananas. ‘Tulugan.’ Rivers and mountain ranges.
21. Tawi-tawi. I will teach here.
22. Manila. Its streets and highways.
23. St. Maries Village, Antipolo. Jad’s place.

Since in practice I have no editor in the local newspaper I am writing for, I’ve come up of my own ‘rulebook’ where I list all the things I learned during my reports and interviews. Later on, I also wrote in it the things I’ve learned in my day-to-day life here in the UAE. Share ko lang. I might learn a thing or two pa : )

(Note: I did not include the grammar lessons I had from Jad. There’s just too many of them.)

1. Think before you research.
2. Read invitations carefully.
3. Consider what you could do than what you want to do.
4. Control the urge to defend yourself. Stick with your arguments.
5. Refrain from giving off-hand remarks.
6. Do not forget to introduce yourself (and your job title) to the secretary.
7. State your purpose before you interview.
8. Eliminate your need for perfection. Things are fine without your judgment.
9. Do not let yourself get caught with negative thoughts.
10. Live a life of blamelessness.
11. Value today. Value each day.
12. Being right is different from insisting that you are right. If it’s not a do-or-die situation, allow others to be right. They would eventually know if they are wrong anyway.
13. When things get out-of-hand, re-evaluate what is more important. Let your priorities be your deciding factor.
14. When in doubt, pray. There is God. There can be miracles.
15. The more we struggle with our problems, the worse they would seem. The more we want them to go away, the more stress they would cause. But if we will just accept them and consider what they are teaching us, they would just go away.
16. Do not reveal your weakness (especially when no one's asking). It may cause other people to lose confidence in you, leaving small room for improvement.
17. Voice your opinions if you are sure of your facts, and accommodate other’s views.
18. There’s no such thing as fate. It is the person who can make his or her destiny, his or her Personal Legend.
19. God is good – so good that He/She blessed us with our lives and entrusted us with it. The least we could do is give it importance and enrich it.
20. Even if you are determined to achieve something, if you do not really desire it, you will have a difficult time attaining it.
21. Vengeance is a plotted accident that could never bring good. It only wastes people’s lives and resources.
22. Say what you believe in even though it gets unheeded.
23. Respect tradition but be innovative and wise.

And my favorite Confucian proverb (that I paraphrased for my own sake): “Forget what you hear. Remember what you see. Understand what you do.”

Magtitinda ako ng puto. Strawberry flavor. Kaso iniisip ko pa itatawag ko eh. Strawberry Puto o Putong Ichigo? Ahaha, bili kayo ah!

I want to learn this And be able to do this

Naghahanap na nga ako ng classes for this one, kaso wala pa akong makita. Malapit ko na isipin that they don't offer formal training for this kind of art. Sabi nung isang customer na nakikitingin din, I have to be born here to know how to do it. Yung guy naman na gumagawa, wala daw siyang time para turuan ako. But, I'm not giving up hope...

Last Saturday, we went to the Dragon Mart in Dubai. It was my first time to visit the mall and I was really amazed by the A to J row of Chinese goods. Everything from electrical appliances, office products, machinery, lamps and lanterns, foodstuffs, arts and crafts, and of course, shoes and bags are all in there. Isang malaking Tutuban! Disadvantage lang, the mall has natural roofing (if that's what it's called in the engineering world), so you can feel the heat outside. There are also not much choices of restos served by Filipino waitresses who seem to fault you for not being a waitress like them.

I really feel that China will be the next superpower and America knows that kaya tinatadtad siya ngayon ng negative controversies. What do you think?

a) Dahil Biyernes na
b) Dahil nahuli na siya ng boss niya
c) Dahil natambakan siya ng gagawin
d) Dahil cost-cutting ang pinagtatrabahuhan niya sa Internet access
e) Dahil dumating na 'siya'

a) Dahil Linggo
b) Dahil wala siyang mapagkunan ng matinong survey
c) Dahil masama ang loob niya at walang kumagat sa survey na pinakalat niya nung isang araw
d) Dahil ngayon ang inuman nila ni Pretty Rap and co.
e) Dahil ico-copy and paste pa niya itong post ko

Ito ay nakuha ko kay Kitel.


List 21 persons that comes to mind. Babae or lalaki. Kaibigan, kaklase, kapitbahay or kaaway.

1. Jad
2. Jesse
3. Punch
4. Pretty Rap
5. Ali
6. Volt
7. JC
8. Milay
9. Ann
10. Jona
11. Vaneh
12. Lucky Mae (yuh, may katukayo ako. She's living in Davao and she's pretty.)
13. Kendrick
14. Rome (ehehehehe!)
15. Ate Weng
16. Ate Anne
17. XC
18. Pubbles
19. Shiela
20. Julio
21. Ate Leovy


Where did you first meet 17?
= Kanina Kuya Natz, during CLP.

Do you know any of 8's secrets?
= Na hindi rin alam ni Ann? I don't think so.

Did 3 ever hurt you?
= Uhm, muntik na. During the Tats Mi Nat production. Pero mabait si Punch.

Do u think 5 is good looking?
= Aliyya? Ehehehehe, anong sasagot ko dito Ali? Siyempre!

What would be ur reaction if 9 fought with 20?
= A high school friend versus a former crush? Er....

What would be your reaction if 11 went out with 2?
= Jesse and Vaneh? Eh may sinisinta na yata si Vaneh eh. At may mahal na rin si Jesse.

Would you ever date 13?
= Kendrick is Chinese! I don't think he would ask me out on a date.

What would be your reaction if 14 made out with 15?
= May asawa na si Rome eh (huhuhuhu!), and hindi siya iyong tipo ni Ate Weng.

Name at least one fact about 4,9,14 and 19.   
Pretty Rap: a happy person.
Ann: a close friend.
Rome: crush ko.
Shiela: high school friend na nandito rin sa UAE.

Did 7 ever lend u money?
= Kuripot yan si JC eh, ehehehehe!

Describe 21  in one word.
= Ate Leovy: Aning-aning.

Do you think that 12 is funny?
= Si Lucky Mae? Hindi pa kami nagkakasama but she seems to be so.

Would you ever kiss 11?
= Yuh. Beso-beso.

Do you think that 20 is goofy looking?
= Well, Julio looks more like a puppy.

Ever had a pillow fight with 1?
= Ehehehehehe!

Ever slept over in 15's house?
= Hindi pa.

How old is 6?
= Volt? Wait. If Jes is 21, Volt must be turning 21 pa lang. Right, Ali?

Have you ever seen 9 and 8 make out?
=  Make-out ba yung nagkakabati? Parang hindi pa naman nagkakagalit si Milay and Ann eh.

Name one funny event you had with 18.
= Uhm, wala eh. Boring akong kasama.

What's the funniest thing about 13?
= He's a good friend.

What if 16 was your twin sibling?
= Eh di masaya!

Did you ever hug 7?
= Yuh. Pero that was years ago. I wish I could hug her right now...

Did 2 ever make you really furious?
= Nope. Just sad.

Whats the craziest thing 11 ever did that you know of?
= Wala eh. Sadly, paminsan-minsan na lang ang communication ko sa kanya.

Have u ever seen 10 naked?
= Nope. Jona won't go naked unnecessarily.

I got this from Pretty Rap, Ali and Jules.

By the way, whoever remembers that line from a song I put in my title better tell me so that I would write for you a good comment. Ehehehehe!

Leave a comment and I'll reply by answering the following:

1. I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.
3. I'll pick a flavor of jello to wrestle you in.
4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me.
5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you.
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.
8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal.

Share 8 things that your readers don’t know about you.Then at the end you tag 8 other bloggers to keep the fun going.

– Each blogger must post these rules first.
– Each blogger starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
– Bloggers who are tagged need to write on their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
– At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
– Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

Share 6 weird things/Gross things that your readers don’t know about you.
Then at the end you tag 8 other bloggers to keep the fun going.

– Each blogger must post these rules first.
– Each blogger starts with six random facts/habits about themselves.
– Bloggers who are tagged need to write on their own blog about their six things and post these rules.
– At the end of your blog, you need to choose six people to get tagged and list their names.
– Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

Eight Things You May Not Know About Me -
My first dream is to become a nun. Then a lawyer. Then a dentist. Then a businesswoman. Then a flight attendant. Then a doctor. Then a video jockey or disc jockey. Now, I just want to be happy.
I began to like writing accidentally. I had just intended to get a 'regular glimpse' of my crush who was the Associate Editor of our grade school newspaper when I get picked as the Literary Editor.
I wanted to be a theatre actress and a beauty queen. Before I was operated and the brain surgery I had affected my physical appearance, I had vowed to become the Ms. Universe even if our country would not allow me to represent it (oh I know, that is not possible :)
I am interested in politics.
I do not really know how to deal with guys. I used to think they all have a crush on me.
I like sports. But I was not able to be good even at one.
I worry a lot. When something goes wrong, I always feel responsible.


Six Weird Things That I Do -
    I am not sure if they are what you call weird, but these are habits of mine that I either want to get rid off or I just do not have a logical explanation why I do them.
I always tuck in my top when I go to sleep.
I would finish everything in my plate even though I am already full.
I love vegetables (that can be one) except eggplants (that's another).
I am called Lucky at school and Mae at home.
I would dance in front of the mirror and imagine that I am onstage.
I would stand for thirty minutes after eating.



Six People I Am Tagging
Well, I do not have much people on my list but I want to know your answers, JC! Ehehehehe! Kits and Tere, sagot din kayo ha!

me: Napapagod na ako.

I admire Motorola's gimmick for launching their new phones called the Moto U9. Since their latest model is available in pink and violet, they did a fashion consultancy of sorts so the attendees can figure out what color they are. I ended up being a Violet and a make-up artist from Bourjois painting my face in violet hues. An image consultant from the House of Colours also gave me some pointers in dressing -- I discovered that I am soooo plain. Not that it really matters but... uhm, we'll see.

Well, there's no question that Jad is romantic. But, he can be deadly romantic at times. The first Valentines we had together, he wrote for me a horror-love story. During my birthday two years ago, he gave me a cactus as a present.

He would often talk about death and how everything, even our relationship, has an end. What matters is that we would get to enjoy life and leave no room for regret. But then, he would not accept the probability that I could die before him...

Since we got together, he would give me flowers everyday. He would also buy me ube buchi from Chowking and accompany me when going home as well as to here and there when I was still writing for the Manila Times.

He would hold my hand and act as if I am uber-special. He would teach me how to write well when I write better than him (haha!). He would call me when we had 'discussions' and not say sorry until we learned our lesson and I do not feel bad anymore. He would wait for me when he can easily have other women prettier and sexier than me.

But the sweetest thing Jad did for me? I think it would be when he walked with me to the LRT station (Doroteo Jose), February 15, 2005, after the day he got broken-hearted. Upon reaching the spot where I could wait for the train and he had crossed the bridge that connected LRT 1 and LRT 2, he looked back at me and gave me the chance to love him...